Do your twins squabble and fight or do they generally play well together? As with all siblings there is a certain amount of sibling rivalry and with twins this is no different and at times it can be worse.
Twins do share a close bond but this doesn't stop them from squabbling and arguing over their toys, clothes and your attention from time to time.
You may find their competitiveness is greater if they are twins of the same sex opposed to boy/girl twins. It is likely that two boys or two girls will want very similar toys to play with and are likely to compete over similar things.
Twins are at the same developmental stage which can also cause more squabbling as they are learning their life lessons and boundaries at the very same time. It is extremely important that parents of twins, grandparents of twins and anyone else caring for your twins have the same rules so your twins do not become confused. If you are consistent with your rules your twins will learn them that much faster.
Set limits and boundaries and limit their choices. Too many choices can cause confusion and often more trouble and squabbling than is necessary so don't ask them to make too many decisions that they are just simply not capable of making.
If you want to encourage them to make choices keep them very simple for e.g. do you want to wear the spotty dress or the striped dress? If your twins are prone to wanting exactly the same thing and will fight over the same dress then do not give them the choice and leave those decisions for another stage.
Twins will fight over the same toy particularly as I have said before if they are two of the same sex. There is no point buying one toy and expecting your twins to share it nicely, it's not going to happen. At the same time you don't want to buy two of everything the same. Slight variations on toys in the form of colour or activity can save some of the squabbling and you can encourage them to swap over.
Likewise, if there are too many toys around they will become overwhelmed and will ultimately play with nothing. Rather than getting all of the toys out in the toy room strategically place toys that will attract their attention and encourage play.
If your twins are tired or hungry then the squabbling can become worse. Twins will take their frustrations out on one another and even more so if they are tired and irritable. If your twins still need a nap make sure they get one.
My Own Experiences with Twins
I have girl/boy fraternal twins aged 7 and identical twin girls aged 2. We are currently going through the learn to share stage with the girls and just as one twin lashes out at the other for stealing her dolly I find myself thinking back to life with the fraternal twins at the same age. I know we are good at forgetting the bad times and remembering the good times but I honestly do not recall my boy/girl twins displaying the same level of squabbling and hurting one another that the identical girls do.
Our Fraternal twins were typical toddlers and our identical twin girls are not in need of a visit from Super Nanny or anything like that but there is a difference in their behaviour. I think the difference is largely due to the difference in the types of twins. There is more natural competition with the identical girls and this is not because we treat them as the same person. We do everything we can to help their individuality but they do seem to want to compete over the same things.
Another difference I have noticed with raising our two different sets of twins is the different needs for naps and how fractious the girls become if they don't get their sleep. The routine for our identical twins is much different than the routine we had for the fraternal twins. For a start, we have school runs now so the girls are up far earlier than the others needed to be. We are generally more in a rush as a family than we were before.
There have been days recently whereby the girls have not had a nap because of an outing or having friends to play and they have managed to play all day quite happily but when the day is done and it's almost time for tea the mood changes and all hell can break loose.
They do take their frustrations out on one another especially when they are tired. When we are in this state it makes it very difficult for me to even prepare the dinner. We rely on the bigger twins to comfort a smaller twin each in a restful setting in front of the TV in order that dinner can be prepared.
This brings me to the next thing that seems to trigger the squabbling - food! It is quite amusing to watch them at the dinner table. Twin A will steal something from Twin B's plate yet think she has got away with it and then a few minutes later completely out of the blue Twin B will get her own back by retaliating in another way. It could be by taking her sisters cutlery away or by just bopping her on the head with her fork. Of course Twin A has forgotten that she stole her sister's food and is upset by Twin B's revenge! Now we have upset and chaos at the table. Our solution starting this evening is to separate their seating places until they are able to manage themselves a little better at the table.
Similar episodes of nonsense as we like to call it happen over sharing toys and books especially if it is something new. We learned with our first set of twins that you can't give one without the other although we do try and buy two of different colours or type. If Twin A is playing nicely and Twin B decides to steal there is uproar. Often Twin A will retaliate with a hit or with a Bite. Obviously the Twin who has administered the Bite will be told firmly NO and we use the naughty step and she has to apologise but its frustrating because we know and she knows that she has done it purely out of retaliation to the wrong that her Twin as done to her. Often they don't want to apologise to one another.
If we are all playing together then I will only get one type of toy out at a time such as the farm set and when they have lost interest in that toy we tidy it away and get another out. I hope that this helps in teaching them to play nicely with more than one person and the importance of sharing and the responsibility of looking after their possessions.
We have issues such as "going first". They nearly always both want to "go first" and you have to find a fair way of choosing. At 2 they don't always remember who went first the last time! Many of the techniques we adopt are all about keeping the peace. It's all too easy to give in to the more demanding twin as we found with raising our fraternal twins so we are conscious that we don't allow this to happen too often.
We have far less squabbles when we are out in open spaces including the garden. I think the girls need space from another at times and often when we go for a visit to the farm they do go in separate directions to play.
The most obvious reason for competing is for our attention. It's ok to mange at home because you can sit down on the sofa in between them and share a book or watch the TV together but it's not so easy when you are out and they both want to be carried or both want help to climb up a particular difficult construction!
All in all, toddler twins can be a real drain your sanity but they are also lots and lots of fun and watching them interact and develop alongside one another is truly fascinating.
I am a mother of two sets of twins both fraternal and identical. I have created a website to assist others during their twin pregnancies and afterwards. http://twinstips.com
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Angela_Manton
Showing posts with label Free Stuff For Twins and Multiples. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Free Stuff For Twins and Multiples. Show all posts
Wednesday, 21 October 2009
Tuesday, 20 October 2009
What To Know If You've Been Blessed With A Multiple Pregnancy
In the United States, since 1980 there has been a 65% increase in the frequency of twins and a 500% increase in the number of triplet pregnancies or higher-order births. The vast majority of this increase has resulted from assisted reproductive technologies(in-vitro or fertility drugs). The risk of a multiple pregnancy resulting from infertility treatments is a very high 25%.
Very recently reproductive endocrinologists have been trying to reduce the number of multiple pregnancies associated with in-vitro procedures by transferring only one embryo, even in older patients. Interestingly, however there is a much higher identical twin rate (identical twins result from one embryo splitting into two, three or even four embryos) associated with in-vitro techniques, so that even when only one embryo is transferred, a multiple pregnancy can result. When infertile couples are surveyed, many are actually thrilled to be "blessed" with a multiple pregnancy--as often they have waited for years before conceiving.
Although multiple pregnancies account for only 3% of all live births, they are responsible for a much larger percentage of pregnancy complications and poor outcomes. 17% of preterm births are the result of multiple pregnancy. 24% of low-birth weight infants are the product of a multiple pregnancy. It is interesting to note however, that although these statistics are accurate, the babies born to parents who have undergone infertility treatments, even if premature or low birth weight, tend to do very well. In part this is because of dramatic advances in care of the premature infant, but another factor is that the parents of these pregnancies are thrilled to be pregnant and are doing everything possible to optimize their outcomes.
What can you do to optimize your outcome?
Get in early with your doctor! If you have been diagnosed with a multiple pregnancy you are going to get to know your doctor very well! If you have been through infertility treatments, your RE (reproductive endocrinologist) will likely have a number of good references. Choose a doctor that you are comfortable with and that you feel will answer all your questions.
Eliminate any remaining bad habits! If you have been through infertility you have likely cleaned up your act pretty thoroughly already, but if there are any vices that linger, such as smoking, drinking alcohol, excessive caffeine intake, etc. now is the time to dispense with these!
Maximize your nutrition. You are going to want to gain a significant amount of weight, but make sure you do it gradually and by eating the right mix of proteins, carbohydrates, and fats. You are also going to want to supplement iron, calcium and folic acid, and you are going to need to choose a supplement you can tolerate!(In another article, we'll talk about nausea of pregnancy!)
You are going to need plenty of rest and will likely end up on bed rest, so get a good bed! You may want to invest in a body pillow to help you position the body that you won't even recognize in a few months!
Get going on your nursery and stock up on supplies - you can't shop while you're on bed rest.
Join THE TRIPLET CONNECTION website - this site has lots of discount codes and suggestions for stores with hard-to-find items. They also have used items for sale by other multiples families which can be very handy and save lots of money!
Get lots of film, or even better, a digital camera or video camera. There are also some very neat baby books which allow you to document your babies' progress in the neonatal intensive care unit--a great site to check out is COME UNITY.
Finally, you are going to want to start making plans at work. You will almost certainly be out of work by 20-24 weeks if you are carrying more than 2 babies. You may want to consider starting a home business! After all that hard work bringing those babies into the world, you may not be eager to leave them in someone else's care when they finally arrive. See my box below for more information about the business I chose that allows me to stay home with my boys while they are babies and still send them to college down the road!
Elaine Brown, M.D. is a former Obstetrician/Gynecologist turned Internet entrepreneur. She is a successful marketer and mother of four including triplets. See her business at MyInternetBusiness.com (new link coming soon!). Or for something just for fun - go to her blog Dr Brown's MyInternetBusiness.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Elaine_Brown
Very recently reproductive endocrinologists have been trying to reduce the number of multiple pregnancies associated with in-vitro procedures by transferring only one embryo, even in older patients. Interestingly, however there is a much higher identical twin rate (identical twins result from one embryo splitting into two, three or even four embryos) associated with in-vitro techniques, so that even when only one embryo is transferred, a multiple pregnancy can result. When infertile couples are surveyed, many are actually thrilled to be "blessed" with a multiple pregnancy--as often they have waited for years before conceiving.
Although multiple pregnancies account for only 3% of all live births, they are responsible for a much larger percentage of pregnancy complications and poor outcomes. 17% of preterm births are the result of multiple pregnancy. 24% of low-birth weight infants are the product of a multiple pregnancy. It is interesting to note however, that although these statistics are accurate, the babies born to parents who have undergone infertility treatments, even if premature or low birth weight, tend to do very well. In part this is because of dramatic advances in care of the premature infant, but another factor is that the parents of these pregnancies are thrilled to be pregnant and are doing everything possible to optimize their outcomes.
What can you do to optimize your outcome?
Get in early with your doctor! If you have been diagnosed with a multiple pregnancy you are going to get to know your doctor very well! If you have been through infertility treatments, your RE (reproductive endocrinologist) will likely have a number of good references. Choose a doctor that you are comfortable with and that you feel will answer all your questions.
Eliminate any remaining bad habits! If you have been through infertility you have likely cleaned up your act pretty thoroughly already, but if there are any vices that linger, such as smoking, drinking alcohol, excessive caffeine intake, etc. now is the time to dispense with these!
Maximize your nutrition. You are going to want to gain a significant amount of weight, but make sure you do it gradually and by eating the right mix of proteins, carbohydrates, and fats. You are also going to want to supplement iron, calcium and folic acid, and you are going to need to choose a supplement you can tolerate!(In another article, we'll talk about nausea of pregnancy!)
You are going to need plenty of rest and will likely end up on bed rest, so get a good bed! You may want to invest in a body pillow to help you position the body that you won't even recognize in a few months!
Get going on your nursery and stock up on supplies - you can't shop while you're on bed rest.
Join THE TRIPLET CONNECTION website - this site has lots of discount codes and suggestions for stores with hard-to-find items. They also have used items for sale by other multiples families which can be very handy and save lots of money!
Get lots of film, or even better, a digital camera or video camera. There are also some very neat baby books which allow you to document your babies' progress in the neonatal intensive care unit--a great site to check out is COME UNITY.
Finally, you are going to want to start making plans at work. You will almost certainly be out of work by 20-24 weeks if you are carrying more than 2 babies. You may want to consider starting a home business! After all that hard work bringing those babies into the world, you may not be eager to leave them in someone else's care when they finally arrive. See my box below for more information about the business I chose that allows me to stay home with my boys while they are babies and still send them to college down the road!
Elaine Brown, M.D. is a former Obstetrician/Gynecologist turned Internet entrepreneur. She is a successful marketer and mother of four including triplets. See her business at MyInternetBusiness.com (new link coming soon!). Or for something just for fun - go to her blog Dr Brown's MyInternetBusiness.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Elaine_Brown
Free Stuff For Twins And Multiples
A sure way to double the joys of parenthood is to give birth to twins! You'll have twice the smiles, goos & coos, giggles, and firsts (first words, first steps, first burps...) But for many soon-to-be parents of twins, once the excitement wears off, the math sets in...
Suddenly you find yourself with twice the dirty diapers, twice the mouths to feed in the middle of the night, twice the formula to buy. Then, there are twice the outfits and booties to get. You'll need two cribs, playpens, baby swings... The next thing you know, double the fun has turned into triple the financial stress.
But before you begin pulling out your hair and pawning the family keepsakes, read on. Many rewards and incentive companies out there realize that oftentimes, parents of twins need an extra break. They offer coupons, freebies, discounts, free stuff for twins and many other incentives.
Gerardas Norkus is a successful author and publisher of http://www.1st-in-rewards.com
Great tips on receiving free merchandise and money from top online rewards programs.
(c) Copyright 2004, http://www.1st-in-rewards.com All rights reserved.
Publishing Guidelines: You may freely distribute or publish this article provided you publish the whole article and include the copyright notice and links in full. A courtesy copy is requested upon publication.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Gerardas_Norkus
Suddenly you find yourself with twice the dirty diapers, twice the mouths to feed in the middle of the night, twice the formula to buy. Then, there are twice the outfits and booties to get. You'll need two cribs, playpens, baby swings... The next thing you know, double the fun has turned into triple the financial stress.
But before you begin pulling out your hair and pawning the family keepsakes, read on. Many rewards and incentive companies out there realize that oftentimes, parents of twins need an extra break. They offer coupons, freebies, discounts, free stuff for twins and many other incentives.
Gerardas Norkus is a successful author and publisher of http://www.1st-in-rewards.com
Great tips on receiving free merchandise and money from top online rewards programs.
(c) Copyright 2004, http://www.1st-in-rewards.com All rights reserved.
Publishing Guidelines: You may freely distribute or publish this article provided you publish the whole article and include the copyright notice and links in full. A courtesy copy is requested upon publication.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Gerardas_Norkus
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